So Halloween is just 2 week away I am so excited (even though I have just booked to see the Christmas Panto on Christmas Eve and to visit the winter wonderland eeeek Christmas isn’t far away!) Apart from Christmas, Halloween is my most favourite holiday! I love carving pumpkins with the kids!! These are our pumpkins from last year!
Harry’s is a funny bat, Lily’s is Ariel, Declan’s is batman, mine was a normal pumpkin and Dan attempted to make a ghost.
As this is the last day of Baby Loss awareness week, my candle will be burning tonight in memory of our 4 little angels who we sadly miscarried, for my friends and family who have suffered a loss, and for every other angel baby that parents are missing.
The whole year is a bit of a blur. I do remember every single due date though, June 12th 2011, Nov 11th 2011, Feb 15th 2012, and April 27th 2012.
When I found out I was pregnant with Lily and Declan I told everyone straight away, however when I found out I was pregnant in Oct 2010, Declan was 7 months old and we knew we wanted another and were over the moon, however I said to Dan that we should hold back telling anyone, I have no idea why. Just mothers instinct I suppose. When I started to bleed I rang the doctors, we went for an emergency scan and they confirmed that I was miscarrying. I was 10 weeks pregnant! Just 2 weeks from telling people and it was awful. I went to the hospital on my own as Dan had to look after Lily and Declan and we still hadn’t told anyone. It was freezing out, and the hospital is an hour and half away. I walked home.. it was cold, raining and I felt nothing, I was totally numb and heartbroken! I cried the whole way home. Dan ran me a bath for when I got in and we barely spoke about it. Was too hard. About 3 months later I felt ready to try again. Not that I had forgotten what happened, I never will, but I still wanted another baby to fill our home.
When Harry was just a few days old we noticed dry patches all over his skin, these quickly developed into red raw eczema. He was constantly scratching, making it bleed and was in a lot of pain. Despite all of that he was a happy chappy who still smiled at any given opportunity but as a mother it was heartbreaking to watch him go through that.
We went to the doctor within his first month and we got prescribed diprobase, I am pretty against steroid creams, especially with young children, so was really hopeful that this moisturiser would work. 2 weeks and there was no difference at all, in fact it was getting worse as you can see from these pictures, it was getting raw and bleeding!
This is him in the garden with patches on his face, nose cheeks and hands.
I hate having my photo taken with a passion. I love taking photos, being behind the camera and capturing anything that I can! But I hate having my photo taken, but I love to have a nice family photo! So with this in mind, I put my face on, brush my hair and off we went to the park!
I let the kids play for a while to get rid of their excess energy and excitement from being in the park whilst I looked around for a nice background for my family photo!
As I have lost the tiny piece that goes into my tripod to attach my camera to the tripod I couldn’t use it! So I settled for a bench and my camera bag to balance it on to make it the right height, but please don’t follow these steps at home! How my camera didn’t fall I have no idea! So I did a few test shots with just the kids (Dan gets bored VERY easily!) As you can see I got the positioning of everything all wrong to start with!
Dan normally works on a Saturday day but this week his shift swapped to the night shift, now normally when this happens the weather is rubbish and we end up being stuck in the house with no where to go playing games or watching tv, which of course there is nothing wrong with, but I like to get out of the house and do something. So thankfully yesterday the weather was lovely!! It was a perfect Autumn day!
We decided to go for a walk to Gwrych Castle which is about a 15 minute walk from our house (5 minutes without kids ;)) we put wellies on as it had been raining and I knew there would be lots of puddles, luckily for Declan I was right!! Lily on the other hand hates getting messy!
Here are a few pictures from our day!
This is Lily and Declan doing their “farmer” poses